My Totally Racist Article


Have you seen the hilarious Qiaobi 俏比 ad? Black people have claimed that it would be racist. I don’t think so. And the Chinese company which made the ad does not think so either.

Qiaobi 俏比 has issued an apology today and explained that they did not know what they were doing. I believe them. They are Chinese. They don’t understand their own racism. We white people have to explain it to them. Because we white people have superior moral standards. We have learned from our mistakes. We had black slaves, you know. The Asians did not have black slaves, so they don’t understand racism as much as we do. And the blacks understand racism the most, because they were slaves before.

All blacks were slaves, so they all have a special right to complain. And all whites had slaves, so they have no right to tell blacks what racism is and what it is not. Whites actually don’t have any right to demand anything from blacks. Blacks on the other hand have every right in the world to demand something from whites. Or Asians, for that matter. That’s why a white person should not even try to discuss racism. Don’t even try to present the Chinese ad in any positive way. Like pretending that it is only about the detergent and how powerful it is for removing dirt. Dirt is negative. One should never associate dirt with being black. Don’t even think about it. No, dirt has nothing to do with being black.

Of course some Asian guy might have assumed that color only goes skin deep. That we are all just people and that the only thing differentiating this black guy in the ad from a Chinese guy is the color of his skin. That would be very naive. Of course black people are totally different from Whites and Asians. They will never accept this kind of white-washing. And they will never even try to see this ad in a positive way. Because they are simply too stupid for that.

The average black man is so stupid that he would not be able to work in middle management with or without a university education. It’s in their nature. Because race is more than skin deep. You can’t explain any other potential interpretation of this Chinese ad to black people because they won’t get it. Did you notice that the ad might be seen as sexist as much as racist? After all it’s the woman forcing the man into the washing machine. And it’s the woman who is portrayed as all clean and powerful.

So you have several aspects to this ad: Humor, irony, color of skin, gender, and in the end: love. Because it all ends on a happy note. This is all too much for black people. Their limited intelligence only allows them to perceive one message at a time. All they see is race. That’s how stupid they are. We white people know about black stupidity and that’s why we won’t even try arguing with them. We just apologize right away and avoid this topic. We also avoid black people in general, of course. If you challenge their stupid beliefs, they start rioting and destroying their own neighborhoods. Like monkeys. There is really no point trying to reason with them. We just move away from them as far as we can and apologize whenever they feel offended. You have to keep the animals happy. I hope the Chinese will learn that one day. They had no black slaves, but they are clever, so they will figure this thing out.

Unlike some people.

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